This blog follows the one I wrote titled Synthesising the Pseudo & the Science which might help in understanding where this all stems from.
In that piece I share a podcast by Terry Real where he details his boyhood experiences into manhood. In the podcast he speaks about how at 35 years old he spent a week in therapy with his mother and father before marriage.
He pauses in the podcast in a light sob and recounts how he saw his father cry for the first time, unleashing the years of anguish he carried. The quote below registers to me as the watershed moment where grace and truth emerge and where Terry becomes the bearer of a new era of healthy manhood for his family.
“Every tear you cry, is one I don’t have to.”
Terry Real
In the podcast there is an idea he shares which resonates with me on how he made the decision to stop the vicious cycle of depression and aloofness by the men in his family, he also shares how he is glad his sons will not experience what he did from his abusive father.
“Family pathology rolls from generation to generation.
Terry Real
Like a fire in the woods taking down everything in its path, until one person and one generation has the courage to turn and face the flames. That person brings peace to their ancestors and spares the children that follow.”
In the previous blog post I realised I did not allow my curiosity on modern masculinity to ventilate a tad more, and I suppose with good reason as I was also trying to carry my thoughts on how I consume media. So, I am peeling back the layers with this and sharing some episodes from other podcasts on the theme.
This is in no way intended to be prescriptive but certainly a sense that some men are engaging on modern masculinity, or it perhaps it is my own projection on my own curiosity on the topic.
I do hope to come across more African Local and Indigenous Knowledge content, that is accessible and shareable on the digital landscape. Please share if you do find it.
I also stumbled on a guy called Kier Gaines by chance. At first encounter I thought he was disingenuous but having soaked up more of his content, I found there to be something interesting in the things he shares.
Again, as the Greek philosopher, Socrates says “in moderation”.